'I said it's his choice': 8-year-old wins fancy toy in raffle, gets pressured to give it away by adults after another kid throws a tantrum about it

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  • 01
    r/AmltheAsshole u/Butterscotch Naive801 • 17h AITA for not making my son give away his second prize?
  • 02
    I have 2 sons: Robbie (16) and Cameron (8). Robbie had an awards banquet for his team, the entire family went. Every year they have a raffle with a bunch of different prizes. I bought both of my sons a roll of tickets each and told them to put in for whatever. Cameron had 2 things he really wanted: a LEGO kit and a remote control car. He put basically all his tickets in for those.
  • 03
    There was another boy there, probably a little younger than Cameron, who was running around and saying the the was going to win the remote control car. Everyone would just smile and say "we'll see!"
  • 04
    Come time for the raffle, Cameron won the LEGO kit. A few draws later and he also wins the remote control car. When the other little boy's parents explained to their son he didn't win, he broke down in a huge tantrum where he was screaming and crying. His dad had to carry him out because he was causing a bit of a disturbance.
  • 05
    We were sitting with 2 other families at our table and one told Cameron he should give the car to the little boy. Cameron said no. They looked at me for backup and I said it's his choice. I changed the subject. The little boy did return. He came by our table a couple of times but didn't say anything. Just stared at the car, which I felt was fine.
  • 06
    Later, a friend of mine said a few others felt Cameron should've given the little boy the car as he already won something. I said this is just how raffles work and it's a good lesson for kids. There are times my sons haven't won things from raffles or similar events. They learned young it's all up to luck.
  • 07
    Keep in mind, I never heard from the parents of this child. I know the mom in passing as our older sons have hung out a couple of times but not that well. My husband wonders if we should've just encouraged Cameron to give it away. AITA for saying no?
  • 08
    NTA StAlvis 17h Galasstic Overlord [1639] We were sitting with 2 other families at our table and one told Cameron he should give the car to the little boy. Cameron said no. They looked at me for backup and I said it's his choice. Frankly, I would have told off those families for having the audacity to tell a child what he should do with his own possessions.
  • 09
    RebeccaMCullen 17h Partassipant [1] If those families want that little boy to have a remote control car, they can pony up the money and give it to the child's parents to buy him one.
  • 10
    Sunshine030209 13h Yeah, it's really easy to be generous with other people's stuff. He won those prizes fair and square. Honestly, it just teaches the kid the wrong lesson in this situation and could make him an entitled brat.
  • 11
    NTA BulbasaurRanch 17h Supreme Court Just- [119] A child having a tantrum about something not going their way is not your problem to solve. It's absolutely ridiculous that other family made any such comment. You should've told them they are welcome to buy the kid something if they felt so strongly about vocalizing their opinion on it. Your kid got lucky, it would make no sense to punish him for it. If your child had a tantrum would you expect others to give him things because of it? NTA
  • 12
    boymom04 16h Giving in to a child's tantrum in this situation would have just reinforced that behavior for the kid.
  • 13
    NTA Leaves-Lord 17h Partassipant [1] Forcing your son to give up a prize he rightfully won fair and square just because some other kid was throwing a fit about it would've just taught him that he doesn't get to keep his things if someone else wants them badly enough. Standing up for your son was the right move.
  • 14
    cainframe 17h Partassipant [2] It's also teaching the other kid that if he throws a tantrum, he will get what he wants, which is a dangerous thing to teach any little kid and arguably even more dangerous to teach a little boy. There was another boy there, probably a little younger than Cameron The fact that this boy wasn't obviously younger than 8 also means that he's too old to be throwing that kind of a tantrum over something like not winning a prize he wanted.
  • 15
    Quirky_Dog5869 17h Partassipant [3] NTA it's really really really not good to teach a kid that tantrums get him/her what they want. The moment he had one should be the queue for everyone that he shouldn't het his way period. It's a harsh lesson but those are also part of life.
  • 16
    Mspeetah 17h NTA at all. You win some, you lose some. That's life, and an important lesson for the little boy to learn! He can be upset; that's okay! It is a big letdown for a little kid. But giving him the toy wouldn't be helping him in the long run.
  • 17
    Individual_Ad_9213 17h Judge, Jury, and Excretioner [308] NTA. That was the luck of the draw. Sometimes, you win big; sometimes, you lose big. If this other little boy's bad luck matters that much to other parents, they should pass around a collection hat and buy the younger child his own car.
  • 18
    Artistic_Tough5005 17h Professor Emeritass [71] NTA This is how kids learn. We don't always win.
  • 19
    NTA Excellent-Count4009 17h Professor Emeritass [92] Why would you give something away just because someone else wants it? I am quite sure there is osmeone who wants your car, too. You are not considering giving away one of your cars? Why would you make your son give away His stuff? And: All had the option to buy as many raffle tickets as you did.
  • 20
    doctordoctorgimme 16h NTA. When we organize raffles at school, we state clearly that kids can only win one prize, and the tickets are free. The organizers not only didn't make this a condition, but you paid for tickets. Your son won fair and square. If he wanted to give up the toy, he could have. But he didn't. The end.

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